its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
