Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Randomize
