Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
