GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
These tits shall not be calmed
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize