I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
