Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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