Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Randomize
