I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
My breasts were aching with rage.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
