so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize