Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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