Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize