What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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