Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
