isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
