I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
