I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
