I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
