It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Be still, my beating vagina.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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