Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I have already put on my inside pants.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize