I murdered the dance floor call the cops
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize