I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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