"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
