Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
