Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
