That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
