How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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