My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
no you cant smoke seaweed
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
