i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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