I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
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