I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
This is the high leading the old right now
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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