The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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