What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
