He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
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