please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
