Someone shit on the floor
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize