I'm gonna have a badass scar
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize