Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
pray to the hookup gods
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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