i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
