need another drink. this is the easiest way
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
