well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
