You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
