is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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