Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
