I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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