Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
