my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
There's even glitter on my cock...
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