Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
