dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
