Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
