so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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