went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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